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About Me Member Procrastinator Ellie18/United States Recent Activity Deviant for 4 Years
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Statistics 103 Deviations
680 Comments
8,762 Pageviews

Confusion is my middle name

Wed Oct 28, 2009, 9:30 PM
I'm so confused about life right now. I don't know where i'm going or what i'm doing. I don't know what i want. Maybe it's because of the spiraling depression. I think at this point i'm going to have to call Richard Hall and ask for the consent forms to be emailed to me so i can print, sign, scan and send them back. I need my disability now. I need my flexible attendance and relaxed deadlines or i'm going to have a major mental breakdown. I also haven't smoked pot in awhile. I'd pass a drug test right now. It's such a beautiful mood stabilizer. I just can't smoke on campus. I have too much to lose. I've gotten so many offers tho, but i'm not stupid. I starting cutting again. nothing bad though. they're barely scratches. i use a sewing needle. I've been trying to resist using anything that could cause real damage. I just feel like my will is gonna give out and i'm going to shrivel and die. My body just won't be able to take the stress any longer and i'll drop dead. I'm dead inside. It's winter again so keith is uber depressed again. I wish i knew how to console him. It's so hard when i can only stand by and watch as he retreats into himself. Meanwhile i'm the kind of depressed person who wants affection so my instinct is to reach out to him but he doesn't want to be touched. I miss Drew. I miss his hugs, and voice and face and wacky personality. I miss my brother. I can't type any more or i'll cry and my roommate is in the room

  • Mood: Regretful
  • Listening to: the voices in my head
  • Reading: and re reading my writing
  • Watching: my sanity slip away
  • Playing: head games
  • Drinking: liquids constantly

deviantID

i'm always sleepy now that i'm in college. it's a rare and glorious treat

Devious Info

  • Current Residence: My Imagination
  • Interests: Art,cartoons, videogames,killing my lungs,reading,setting things on fire,love,holloween
  • Shell of choice: Koopa
  • Wallpaper of choice: dosens of posters,pictures and random stuff pasted to the wall
  • Skin of choice: um..........mine?
  • Favourite game: Zelda oot, American McGee's Alice, Rule of Rose,DDR
  • Favourite gaming platform: PS2, PC, Nintendo, Super Nintendo, Atari
  • Favourite cartoon character: a..........to many favorites
  • Personal Quote: I'm going to rip out your vocal cords through your eye sockets
  • Tools of the Trade: Pure Insanity

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Comments


:iconkayku810:
hellllo there, its greg :D
:iconxskissorsx:
ello thar :toast:

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I'm hiding under your bed
:iconkissuu:
here we go. 8D These are the characters I was talking about
Kirihana [link]
She's my friend ~kirihime's character
And then Kiriko [link] is my character.

You can change up their outfits and whatnot too if you want, we've got a whole bunch of things in this photobucket [link] , bunch of random references, clothes style examples, pose ideas, etc. There are subalbums upon subalbums. xD

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Kiri Schwartz on Gaiaonline.
Please call me Kiri. :kitty:

I like critique, so crit my art please! :heart:

Please commission me~
Commission info is here
:iconcrackmonkeys666:
thanx fot the fave and watch!!:)

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:i like yo yos:
:iconxskissorsx:
your welcome. your poetry is interesting. captures one's attention.

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I'm hiding under your bed
:iconcrackmonkeys666:
well thank you:)
i like to aim for catching a persons eye for a moment in time

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:i like yo yos:
:iconxskissorsx:
you're welcome

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I'm hiding under your bed
:iconkissuu:
SADNESS.
I'm sorry I couldn't go. You sounded so sad on the phone when i said I couldn't go~
My mom is mean sometimes. ><
I really wanted to go, too. But she was like 'Omg Tyrra you wouldn't like it, there's drugs and stuff'
DD:

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Kiri Schwartz on Gaiaonline.
Please call me Kiri. :kitty:

I like critique, so crit my art please! :heart:

Please commission me~
Commission info is here
:iconxskissorsx:
actually it's a very safe place. there is staff all over the place and under age people get sharpie X's on their hands so they can't drink. one entrance and one exit. both have staff guarding them. and staff outside for people chilling there or smoking

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I'm hiding under your bed

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